Friday, August 30, 2013

'Duck Dynasty' recap: Robertsons shop for a hot tub, Phil spends time with the grandchildren

One good deed deserves another–at least that’s the philosophy in West Monroe, Louisana, where the stars of A&E’s “Duck Dynasty” make their home. This week's episode of the series was all about helping each other out. 

“One of the many perks of being in the Robertson clan is that if you need help–all you gotta do is ask for it,” Jase explained of his brothers, Uncle Si and coworker Godwin pitching in to assist in building a new fishing dock. “It’s a great system, but like any other system–there can be people who will abuse it.”

Jase was not-so-subtly referring to Uncle Si, who preferred to “supervise” the boys from dry land during the dock installation–all while sipping on his ever-present sweet tea.

“What’s the point of having family and friends if you can’t ask them for help every once in a while?” asked Si, somewhat rhetorically.

“You’re always asking for favors, but you never help out with any favors,” groused Willie.

“I never ask for no favors,” declared Godwin.

“Yes, you have,” protested Willie.

“I absolutely never ask for a favor,” returned Godwin.

That, as the Robertsons would learn, would soon change. Back at Duck Commander Headquarters, Godwin made a random announcement, “I’m gonna get me a hot tub.”

The boys were stunned. “A hot tub,” Jase said, with obvious disgust. “No self-respecting man would have a hot tub.”

“I would,” said Willie with a slight smile.

“That’s my point,” returned Jase.

“The man wants a hot tub, he should get a hot tub,” reasoned Willie.

Since it was clear that Godwin had his heart set on a hot tub, Willie fired up his laptop and started to search for one online.

“There’s some cool ones–about six grand,” Willie tells Godwin. “What’s your budget?”

“All’s I can spend is two hundred bucks,” said Godwin, flatly.

With such a limited budget, Willie suggested that Godwin purchase a used hot tub. Godwin was fine with that, as long as it had speakers.

One of the Robertson brothers did not approve of Godwin getting any kind of hot tub–with or without speakers.

“I just want to say something on the record,” said Jase. “I am in protest of this. This whole thing is a bad idea. You’re going to get the measles from it. Blisters, skin rashes or hepatitis.”

Willie just shook his head. “When it comes to germs, Jase is a walking contradiction,” noted Willie. “He has no problem crawling through swamps and other disgusting, stagnant bodies of water. But just the mention of a manmade place with clean, animal-free water is enough to send him on a rant for a week.”

After much discussion, Si suggested that only place that might have a hot tub within Godwin’s budget would be a place called Squirrel’s–yes, Squirrel’s–Junkyard.

“That’s actually not a bad idea, because all he has is crap,” laughed Willie.

Meanwhile, Phil and Miss Kay have a few of the grandkids over for the afternoon, who arrive to the Robertson property “fresh from the subdivision.”

Phil is determined to teach his grandchildren “patience and resourcefulness” by gathering mayhaw berries and turning them into jelly.

“Food,” lectured Phil. “What if everything goes south, there are no chicken nuggets, there’s no big, tall Coca-Colas and fries–what then?”

“We would survive like the walking dead,” answered Willie’s grandson, John Luke.

That did not satisfy Phil, and he set out to teach the kids the finer points of mayhaw harvesting.

Back at Squirrel’s Junkyard, the boys have found a budget-appropriate–if disgusting–hot tub for Godwin. They tow it back to Godwin’s house, where he insisted that it be installed in the front yard so that he can “watch the cars go by.”

“What are you, a dog?” asked Willie.

Godwin stands firm, determined that they install the hot tub in the front yard. The boys struggle to unload the hot tub off the truck, and it crashes to the ground with a thud.

“This board broke,” said Godwin.

“That’s just cosmetic,” reassured Willie.

“That’s right,” conceded Godwin. “I’ll get the wood glue.”

After the “cosmetic” damage is fixed, Godwin climbs into the hot tub–(almost) naked and alone.

“Awww, yeah!” hoots Godwin as the bubbles frothed around him.

“In all the years I’ve known Godwin, I’ve never seen him this happy,” observed Willie. “He’s happier than a pig in mud–which is actually a fitting comparison when you consider how disgusting that water probably is.”

At the family dinner, the Robertsons gave thanks, and Willie noted, “Sometimes doing a favor a friend can be quick and easy, other times it means you’ll be spending all day at a stinkin’ junkyard. The point is, you can’t pick and choose how you help somebody. You just help them because they’ve been there to help you.”

Amen.


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